i cannot write about the darkness in this world from the outside, from an observer’s perspective – as if i am not, in every atom of my being, connected to the entirety of the world and all the universe
to keep working with words, with language, until no separation remains – the language of non-alienation.
yet Lyn Hejinian reminds us – as the Buddha also does – that language IS separation – cf. also Julia Kristeva: the thetic break.
therefore how to write utopia? how to write non-alienation with words and language that are alienation, separation from the thing itself?
to write the world from within. within my own subjective experience? within subjectivity-in-relation, subjectivity-in-being. cf. Kristen Kreider: I/You – ‘I’ always posits a ‘you’ – subjectivity is relation.
knowing that the darkness is not separate from myself: knowing that it is intimately connected to my own actions and decisions, knowing that to label another as ‘evil’, or another as ‘other’, is to perform the separation of alienation. yet retaining subjectivity as subject-in-process, subject-in-relation. how does one then write the world from here?
write every day. experiment every day.
the inexpressibly perfect word that cannot be spoken or written – the utopian word that we seek in the act of writing – to say what we desire to say with perfect clarity and precision – to strike at the heart of beingness and out through to the light within. this is the utopia that words aim for. is this Bloch’s inconstruable question? who are we? the ‘we’ problem, not the ‘i’ problem.
utopia = no place = space = gaps and silences between words and meaning, words and their object? to use words is to create an object? the object in relation to the word which can never meet it? the object in relation to the speaking subject? no place / space – not the words themselves but the gaps and silences between. the words, the language, becomes a net or container for the silences, for the utopian, for the inconstruable question.
Hejinian / Stein – repetition is not repetition – shifts in emphasis, shifts in meaning
Cage – silence and sound as equal, as duration
Olson – sound and breathing
cf. Hejinian also says, in The Rejection of Closure:
The relationship of form, or the “constructive principle,” to the materials of the work (to its themes, the conceptual mass, but also to the words themselves) is the initial problem for the “open text,” one that faces each writing anew. Can form make the primary chaos (the raw material, the unorganized impulse and information, the uncertainty, incompleteness, vastness) articulate without depriving it of its capacious vitality, its generative power? Can form go even further than that and actually generate that potency, opening uncertainty to curiosity, incompleteness to speculation, and turning vastness into plenitude? In my opinion, the answer is yes; that is, in fact, the function of form in art. Form is not a fixture but an activity.
Hejinian – form is dynamic, not containing. Open text = open in meaning / interpretation, active response from the reader – not a formal exercise.
how do i write the world from within? acknowledge the darkness without separating myself from it? the darkness as a cry for love and recognition – a need to be held and acknowledged, brought home to utopia, restored and returned, rescued from isolation and alienation. like shamanic soul retrieval: to bring back the wounded and neglected parts of soul / self, that have been cast out and withered without love.
how do i write non-alienation even in the darkness of this world?
write every day.
in writing utopia, non-alienation, i acknowledge myself as a subject-in-relation with all that is: the ‘dark’ and the ‘light’, the ‘good’ and the ‘evil’ – without judgment, distinction or duality. no separation of self from non-self. no judgement with dichotomous terms such as dark and light, good and evil, sound and silence. there just is. by acknowledging myself as subject-in-relation with all that is, i acknowledge all that is as part of myself and acknowledge myself as part of all that is: retrieve the separated soul from exile
words such as ‘vile’ and ‘evil’ express an emotional / emotive sentiment that many are feeling, and thus find their reflections in the hearts and minds of those who read them – but they also serve to perpetuate the separation of self from other, self from non-self. the duality between good and evil, the duality of separation and alienation that refuses to acknowledge and embrace all things without judgement, without exile, without alienation – and then perpetuates the cycle of fear and hate and violence and exile from oneself and the world
it is not an easy or comfortable or popular way to respond to violence and darkness. but it might be the most effective response i can make.
love is universal and unconditional. it is the source and substance of the universe – it’s what we’re made of. to deny it is to alienate ourselves from who we are and all that is